FORM E&E-SHARE · REDEMPTION IN PROGRESS · DO NOT REFRESH (IT WON'T HELP) STATUS: PROVISIONALLY DEGRADED
Edge & Edge® A Perimeter Company · Est. Last Tuesday ← Return to the Perimeter
SHARE REDEMPTION PORTAL
Something is wrong — we are working on it

Your shares are almost here.

Good news: nothing is wrong. Better news: we are working on it anyway. Your shares exist — they are simply not yet observable. This is by design, and the design is, for your protection, redacted.

We have detected an undisclosed inbound transfer to an address you were warmly invited to guess. It has been received, noted, and placed in the queue, where it will be processed in the order in which it was received, and in no particular order.

MINTING SHARES AT THE EDGE6%
Settlement estimate: 6–8 business epochs. The edge is currently busy.
REDEMPTION TICKET: E&E-SHR-………
SHARES OWED: an undisclosed amount (provisional)
SHARES OBSERVABLE: 0 (also provisional)
POSITION IN QUEUE: … (advancing)
ESTIMATED WAIT: 6–8 BUSINESS EPOCHS
Read EEP-1 →

Proof of Reserves

In the interest of radical transparency (subject to redaction), we have completed a full attestation of reserves backing every share.

✓ Audited ATTESTATION E&E-PoR-01 · COMPLETED

Reserves are fully backed.*

Reserve ratio
100%+ (rounding applied in our favour)
Auditor
Us
Auditor independence
Total, from you
Methodology
Redacted
Reserves consist of
Forward-looking statements,
one (1) firehose, & the absence of proof
Auditor's opinion
Unqualified, and unqualifiable
Funds located
Somewhere

* "Fully backed" is a forward-looking statement and looks forward to nothing in particular. Reserves are held at the edge, in a manner that is broadly rectangular, and are not available for inspection, withdrawal, or, strictly speaking, confirmation. Can we prove it? We cannot. But we can prove, to audit grade, that we cannot — and a proof of the absence of proof is itself a kind of proof.

Incident Timeline

The Compliance Subcommittee is providing live updates, on a timeline presently under review.

  • EPOCH 0Transfer received. An undisclosed amount arrived somewhere. We thank you for existing within the perimeter.
  • EPOCH 0 +2mShares provisioned. Your shares were minted at the edge and immediately, for safekeeping, made unobservable.
  • EPOCH 1Anomaly detected. A Subcommittee was convened. The anomaly is that everything is, technically, fine.
  • EPOCH 1 +∞Root cause identified. Root cause has been identified as pending. A fix is being proposed, reviewed, and — in accordance with EEP-1 — tabled.
  • EPOCH 2Proof of Reserves completed. Audited by us, to us, on our own letterhead. Result: reassuring.
  • NOWWorking on it. We are working on it. We will continue to work on it. This is the work.
  • SOON™Shares appear. Your shares will become observable in 6–8 business epochs. The estimate is firm and subject to change.

Frequently Deflected Questions

Answers are provided for completeness, and should not be mistaken for information.

Q.Where are my shares?+
They are being minted at the edge and will settle shortly. "Shortly" is defined elsewhere, in a document that supersedes itself. Your shares are safe — so safe, in fact, that not even we can reach them.
Q.Where did my undisclosed amount go?+
Somewhere. It has been received and is fully accounted for, to a standard of accounting we decline to disclose. Per Proof of Reserves above, funds have been located. We will not be saying where, when, or in what form.
Q.Can I withdraw?+
Withdrawals are fully supported and have always been fully supported. To initiate one, simply submit Form E&E-7B, in triplicate, in person, to the Annex — which is itself currently unobservable, pending review of the perimeter.
Q.Is this a rug?+
Absolutely not. A rug would imply something was pulled. Nothing has been pulled. Everything remains precisely where it is — namely, somewhere, at the edge, broadly rectangular, and provably unprovable. We are working on it.
Q.When, realistically?+
6–8 business epochs. Realism is not a service we currently offer, but it is on the roadmap, pending a process for offering it being proposed, reviewed, and tabled.